Saturday, July 29, 2006

Gazebo blogging

About a week ago, my sister and I finished replacing the gazebo's busted screens. We then swept all the crap out and did a thorough debugging (though we're still gonna get some outdoor bug spray because we suspect there are things nesting inside the gazebo's nooks and crannies). Then, today -- just a few minutes ago, actually -- we got the wireless Internet working out here. So even though it's 94-degrees out, I'm sitting in the gazebo's shade, enjoying the breeze blowing off the harbor, and blogging about it. This is the life.

All that remains for the gazebo project is to get one of them spring-loaded thingamajiggers to keep the door closed, and to put up some lights (of the Xmas and reading varieties). The plan to plant plants in the plant boxes has been scrapped due to wiener dog digging activities (we suspect they are building an underground wiener dog day spa. We also suspect they are gay).

Right now there is a yellow inchworm inching himself behind my shoe. Only a minute ago he was inching himself up my bare leg, but that started to tickle, so I had to relocate him. He was supposed to inch his way to safety, preferably somewhere far away from me, or perhaps under my chair, but he insists on lingering near my shoes and I'm afraid I'm going to step on him. Which would be sad because what if this inchworm is destined to become the world's most beautiful butterfly and I accidentally killed him? How could my conscience -- my soul! -- bear it? I shall deny the world no beauty! Such was the solemn oath I swore.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Little Brother

At long last, the FBI finally gave Big Brothers Big Sisters of Long Island the green light on me not being a psychopath, sex offender, or terrorist, which means all systems are go for me to enter the BBBSLI program. So today, BBBSLI called to tell me about a Little Brother they had in mind for me.

The first words out of my case worker's mouth were, "He's one of our more challenging children," and then she went into a long list of what those challenges are. The kid has been through everything from an alcoholic drop-out "inappropriate" father, to living in a group home because his mother is frequently hospitalized. It was jaw-dropping to hear about his life and all his hardships and troubles and how his main goal is to boost his self-esteem so he can help his mom. And he's only 14. It's crazy that there are real kids like this out there. You hear these stories and think they're made for TV, but here I am getting a call to be a part of this kid's non-TV life.

I think the case worker is expecting me to get scared away and ask for a different Little, and I get until Friday to decide if I want to be this kid's Big, but I think I've already made up my mind that I absolutely want to be matched with him. My heart was already going out to him even before the caseworker went into the list of positive things about him, which are, among other things: he's into reading and science, is super smart (college reading level), and very insightful, and kind of awkward and nerdy (which were originally in the "negatives" column, but I've re-appropriated them).

So I'm going to take the next two days to digest everything. It's all a jumble in my head right now. But I expect to say yes on Friday and then they'll tell the kid they've got a potential Big for him, and if he's interested in me, we'll get to meet and see how it goes from there. I'm totally psyched. Super psyched. Mega psyched.

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Ask Dr. Z

Maybe you've seen Daimler-Chrysler's new "Ask Dr. Z" commercials. You can thank me.

Fucking health insurance

I've changed health insurance three times in less than a year. There's no point in going into the details why since it will just give me an ulcer to relive it, but presently I have MDNY, and I was very happy with them, until a few weeks ago when I started getting letters from all the doctors I've seen in the past few months telling me that MDNY has inexplicably been refusing to reimburse them for anything. It's unbelievable. My allergy medicine is apparently "uncoverable" because I'm too old. I'm not even sure what the fuck that means -- too old for allergy medicine? Do they think I'm trying to order something off the fucking Happy Meal menu? At this point, I don't even know why I'm paying for health insurance. When I call them tomorrow, I'll ask them to explain it to me.