Sunday, April 23, 2006

Rain is bullshit

I could be out jogging. Or biking. Or riding my freakin' motorcycle. But noooooooooooooo -- it's freakin' raining. Again. Two days in a row. Three, almost, since Friday was crappy also. What the fuck, man? We don't even need rain anymore. Rain is obsolete. Between global warming, in-ground sprinkler systems, and bottled water, it's time for rain to realize that its day is done. It's over. Time to say goodbye. And don't come back again until we need some snow, which is about all rain is good for until we start importing that, too. Fucking rain.

9 comments:

OlmanFeelyus said...

I'm sorry to give you a hard time, Mr. Mond, and I don't know about motorcycle riding, but you can and should be both running and riding in the rain. It's the best! Get out there, give in to the wet and the cold. When you are coming through the back side of a run in the rain, you're soaked through but your own body heat is keeping you comfortable, steam is coming off your shoulders and your sweat is mixing with the fresh water to keep you from getting too salty, it's the best feeling! What's wrong with being wet? You don't have anywhere to go but the shower when you get home. Go for it. Once you find the magic of running and riding in the rain, a rainy day becomes an opportunity. Give'r!

OlmanFeelyus said...

You're blog is smoking crack.

Crumbolst said...

I agree- definitely run in the rain!

Anonymous said...

Check out my blog. Funny coincidence or maybe everyone in NY is writing about the rain.

Running in the rain sounds nice.

Mustapha Mond said...

You people should call yourselves the Miserati. Your motto could be: "We like to do things that suck."

You know what John Denver would say to you if he were here right now (which he is, in spirit)? He would sing you this song:

Sunshine on my shoulders makes me happy
Sunshine in my eyes can make me cry
Sunshine on the water looks so lovely
Sunshine almost always makes me high

If I had a day that I could give you
I’d give to you a day just like today
If I had a song that I could sing for you
I’d sing a song to make you feel this way

Sunshine on my shoulders makes me happy
Sunshine in my eyes can make me cry
Sunshine on the water looks so lovely
Sunshine almost always makes me high

If I had a tale that I could tell you
I’d tell a tale sure to make you smile
If I had a wish that I could wish for you
I’d make a wish for sunshine all the while

Sunshine on my shoulders makes me happy
Sunshine in my eyes can make me cry
Sunshine on the water looks so lovely
Sunshine almost always makes me high
Sunshine almost all the time makes me high
Sunshine almost always

Anonymous said...

Brilliant retort. Still cracking up over the motto, "We like to do things that suck." I don't run in the rain either. I do sing in it though.

Mustapha Mond said...

I'm just jonesing for blue skies. But in fairness to Olman, running in the rain can be fun. I did it a lot during our crappily mild winter. It sucks while you're doing it, but it's rewarding when you're done.

Anonymous said...

Does running in place in the shower count? I did that once after seeing the greatest girl-from-the-wrong- side-of-the-tracks-dances-her-way-to-the-top movie ever, "Flashdance."

Mustapha Mond said...

It only counts if you sang "she's a maniac, maaaaniac on the floor!" while you were doing it.